Friday, November 4, 2016

Why This World Series Was Special to Me

Tuesday, Nov. 1, 2016.
Buffalo Wild Wings, Moore, Okla.
Game 6, World Series
Except for one guy with a neck tattoo, the entire bar is filled with Chicago Cubs fans. Except for one guy with a neck tattoo, the entire bar erupts when Anthony Rizzo belts a two-run homer to cap a 9-3 Cubs victory, tying the World Series at three games apiece and forcing a decisive Game 7.
When the furor dies down, my buddy James Hawkins leans over, gestures at the dozens of Cub fans in the room and says, “You know, you’re kind of at the cutoff age for people like us who grew up Cubs fans because of WGN.”
He’s right. I’m 36 years old and one of the younger people in the bar. Harry Caray died when I was 18 and television changed forever soon afterward. Now you can watch any team you want every day of the season. But if you’re over 30, you grew up with exactly two options: the Cubs on WGN or the Braves on TBS.
Day baseball, Ryne Sandberg and Harry Caray are the reasons I picked the Cubs. Ironically, one generation earlier my father became a Cardinals fan because they were the only team you could pick up on radio. Harry Caray called the Cardinals games back then.

Thursday, July 23, 1998
Wrigley Field, Chicago, Ill.
High school graduation present
Most Cubs home games start at 1:20 p.m. In junior high, I could run the quarter-mile home from school and get there by 2:40. In high school the 10 minute drive got me home at about the same time. So I watched the last 6 innings of more baseball games than I can count.
My favorite after-school WGN game was played May 6, 1998, when Kerry Wood tied a Major League record with 20 strikeouts. I got home in the top of the fourth and couldn’t believe how nasty Wood’s breaking pitches were and how pinpoint his control of a 98-mph fastball was. In the 7th inning I picked up our landline and called my best friend Chad Anderson, who wasn’t a Cubs fan but was a huge baseball fan nonetheless.
“Dude, you gotta flip over to WGN and watch Kerry Wood.”
Two months later, for the first time in my life, I would get to experience Wrigley Field. Mom, dad and I arrived very early and got front-row bleacher seats in right field so Sammy Sosa would sprint right at us to start the game, his right hand cupped over his ear to get the crowd roaring. Sosa didn’t hit one of his 66 home runs that day, but a journeyman catcher named Scott Servais did hit one, and the Cubs beat the Montreal Expos 2-1. I wore a Mark Grace jersey, got scolded by an usher for leaning over the wall and stealing a single leaf of Wrigley’s famous ivy, and someone (perhaps the very same usher) was nice enough to take our picture. It will always be my favorite picture with mom and dad.

Tuesday, Oct. 14, 2003
Lawton Constitution newsroom, Lawton, Okla.
Game 6, National League Championship Series
I was too young to remember Leon Durham’s error in the 1984 NLCS that kept the Cubs out of the World Series, so my earliest memory of playoff heartbreak came in 1989, as a 9-year-old. I saw my favorite pitcher, Greg Maddux, give up a home run to Will Clark as San Francisco won the series in five games.
Those 1998 Cubs I saw in person wound up making the playoffs but were swept by the dominant team of the decade, Atlanta. Now, in 2003, it’s a new decade, a new millennium, and the Cubs have already vanquished the Braves in the first round of the playoffs. Up 3-2 in the NLCS against Florida, the Cubs needed just one win in two tries at Wrigley Field. With twin aces Mark Prior and Kerry Wood slated to start those games, the World Series seemed a foregone conclusion.
I was in my second year at the Constitution. I finished my writing early in the day, which left me with one task – watch the Cubs go to their first World Series in 58 years, come up with a snazzy headline and slap the story onto the page before deadline. When I was there, the only television in the entire newsroom was a tiny 18-incher that hung from the ceiling about eight paces from my desk. It was perpetually covered in dust. I made that short walk about a million times from 2002 to 2009, but never as many times or at as brisk a pace as I did that night.
I never blamed Steve Bartman for interfering with MoisesAlou’s catch. Having watched thousands of Cubs games before and since, I think that’s the only ball ever hit to that spot where the left fielder had a legit play on the ball. Any Cub fan would have done the same thing without thinking about it. Moments later though, when sure-handed shortstop Alex Gonzalez booted a routine ground ball, I knew the Cubs were sunk. I made the desk-to-TV walk about 25 more times that inning, going from mad to madder to despondent as the Marlins scored eight runs and won the game.
I knew the Cubs were destined to lose Game 7 before it started, not because they’re cursed but because teams who lose in devastating fashion in Game 6 never bounce back to win Game 7. Look it up, it’s history. I took the night off from work, unplugged my phone and watched Game 7 by myself in my apartment. They lost and I was sad, but at least I didn’t have to have annoying consolation conversations about it. Curses and “Next year” are for losers.

Saturday, Oct. 22, 2016
Best Western Hotel, Branson, Mo.
Game 6, National League Championship Series
A lot changed in the 13 years since the Bartman game. Somehow, I now have an amazing wife and four kids. I still watch every Cubs game of the season, but usually it’s on a fast-forward DVR so it only takes 45 minutes to watch a nine-inning game.
We spent the entire day at Silver Dollar City, getting back to our hotel just as Game 6 of the NLCS was about to begin. Behind a dominating pitching performance from Kyle Hendricks, the Cubs beat the Dodgers 5-0 to make the World Series for the first time in 71 years.
I celebrate quietly with cheap beer purchased at the Dollar General across the street. All of my kids are asleep in the crowded hotel room. On the right is Addison, my seven-year-old daughter named after the street on which Wrigley Field resides. On the left are my boys – two-year-old Maddux and one-year-old Hawk, named after another Cubs Hall of Famer, Andre “Hawk” Dawson. Adoption is the only thing saving 4-year-old Myra from a Cub-centric name as she sleeps curled up in the bed right next to me.
Watching the Cubs dogpile near the mound after their historic accomplishment, I understand intellectually that I am supposed to cry in this moment. But I don’t.

Wednesday, Nov. 2, 2016
Buffalo Wild Wings, Moore, Okla.
Game 7, World Series
After the Cubs won Game 6, we had no choice but to return to BWW for Game 7. I’d been wearing the same Dawson jersey (unwashed, obviously) since the Cubs won Game 5 and hadn’t shaved since then either. This time we got a babysitter so my wife Missy could join in the fun.
If you’re still reading this, you probably don’t need to be told how the game went. I could have done without the Indians’ 8th-inning rally, but it did make for a more epic finish.
I don’t worry about the bandwagon Cubs fans that seem to be popping up everywhere this week. It won’t be the same for them. I’m very happy for this 2016 team and the championship, but what really makes it special are the years of memories the true Cub fans have invested.
For me, that’s running to the bathroom every half-inning as a 12-year-old so I wouldn’t miss an inning of a Cubs team that went 77-83.
It’s mom and I almost getting run over by Cubs pitcher Steve Trachsel as he sped out of the players’ parking lot at Wrigley Field after a game.
It’s driving to St. Louis with dad for a Cubs-Cardinals series and seeing Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa hit three homers apiece in three games.
It’s catching two batting practice home runs in the bleachers on the same day while on a college-graduation road trip with my two best friends. I was sick for the entire trip and didn’t know why -- turns out I had mono.
It’s taking Missy to Chicago before we had kids, splurging on good seats and converting her into a Cubs fan for life. The deep dish pizza may have helped.
When I get emotional about the Cubs winning the World Series, it’s because of these memories, not anything specific to this 2016 team (as awesome as they were). I know there are countless other Cubs fans here in Oklahoma and around the world who have their own memories and experiences that are as deeply embedded in their persona as mine are to me. To all of you, I raise a can of Old Style beer to the sky and give you two words: Eamus Catuli!




Sunday, November 29, 2015

Turns Out I Missed My Son's Birth

If you already know the full story of my fourth child's birth and how I came to miss it, don't bother with this blog and wait another four months for my next one.
Let me open by saying I think I've been a pretty good husband overall, particularly when it comes to my role during our children's births.
For Addison, I drove us from Lawton to Oklahoma City in a hard, freezing rain on Christmas night and then rubbed Missy's back for 10 hours until Addie got here.
For Maddux, we spent 24 hours at the hospital because Missy's water broke a few weeks early and he wasn't quite wanting to come out yet.
Myra's "labor" was the longest of them all, because we got her as foster parents when she was 3 months old and it took almost a year from the time the state of Oklahoma said we could adopt her to the point when it actually happened.
Needless to say, missing the birth of our fourth child wasn't even on my radar.
Missy's due date was Sept. 19. On Sept. 12 I drove two hours to Winstar casino on the Texas border to play poker. Missy's family was in town and I was only a two-hour drive away so Missy was in good hands. I told her to call me anytime and I'd head back home.
I ended up playing poker most of the day and night on Sept. 12. I checked in with Missy several times and she said she was feeling good. I ended up not going to bed until 5 am, at which time I left Missy a voicemail specifically telling her not to go into labor until I had gotten a few hours of sleep. But you know women, they never listen.
Turns out, the early labor had probably already started at that point. Missy said she had some contractions through the night, but they weren't necessarily intense enough or regular enough to make her think this was definitely the real deal.
By 7 a.m. on the 13th, she was starting to think this would be the day Hawk would be born. She called her friend Katrina, who lives 3 hours away and has helped with all of Missy's births. Katrina headed from Kansas to Oklahoma right then, but Missy thought she had a long day of labor ahead of her and wanted me to be fresh, so she sweetly gave me a few more hours of sleep before calling me at 11 a.m.
By then, Katrina was here and they decided it was time to head to the hospital. I hopped in the shower, grabbed my stuff and was on the road at 11:30. It took Missy awhile to gather everything for her labor bag and head to the car. She was stopping every 30 seconds and having long, hard contractions. She said she stopped every 3 feet on the walk from our bedroom to the car, so it took her 10 minutes to walk that short distance. Obviously, this baby was coming fast.
Missy's mom drove her and Katrina to the hospital, and they called to tell me to head straight to OU Medical, where Missy works as a labor nurse and where all of our kids were born. They arrived at 1 p.m.
Missy's mom dropped her and Katrina off at the front door and looked for a parking spot. By the time she got to the room, Hawk Harvey Franklin had already been born. Missy barely made it to the room when she had a big contraction and immediately felt the urge to push. She had Hawk in the doorway of the bathroom while our awesome midwife Deb caught him and Katrina captured the fleeting moment on video. Everyone else missed it.
I was pretty shocked when I got a call at 1:20 and heard a baby crying in the background. I arrived at the hospital at 1:30, just a little late, although Missy and I agree that we preferred the quick birth to the long labors she'd had before.
My life has changed quite a bit since Hawk's arrival. Since Missy hasn't been able to get regular sleep at night yet, I've been waking up every morning to take Addie to school and get Myra and Maddux up and fed. I've really cherished those peaceful mornings with my kids.
The early mornings also mean earlier nights. I'm finishing my poker sessions earlier and haven't had time for three of my favorite hobbies -- bridge games, guitar playing and blogging. But I'm slowly working those things back into my schedule.
It's crazy how fast the time flies. Seems like just yesterday I married the love of my life. Seems like just yesterday I was holding Addie, Myra and Maddux when they were Hawk's size. Seems like just yesterday Missy surprised me with a present when I got home from work. I opened it and it was a positive pregnancy test. Seems like just yesterday we were on a Spring Break trip to Houston when I threw out the suggestion of Hawk as a name. It's both the nickname of one of my favorite baseball players growing up (Andre Dawson) and an homage to Missy's maiden name, Hockett. Harvey was Missy's grandpa's name and we both loved him dearly so that was an easy pairing.
Seems like just yesterday that I was holding two-month-old Hawk when Missy surprised me with another positive pregnancy test. (Just kidding. We're planning on being done.)
We celebrated Thanksgiving by eating a lot of great food and playing games at the house. The only time we left from Thursday to Sunday was a quick trip on Friday to pick out our Christmas tree. That gave me a lot of time to think about my blessings, the newest of which came in at 9 pounds 10 ounces on 9-13-15.

Saturday, August 15, 2015

Aces and Diamonds

Several years ago, my amazing wife Missy and I made a deal. When we turned 35, we would go on a fun trip by ourselves. This was Missy's idea because she wanted to take her friend Katrina to Paris, which they are planning to do in a couple of years.
Missy probably knew that since I am two years older, we would have one or two more kids to deal with by the time her trip came around, but I wasn't smart enough to think about that so I agreed to her proposal.
I thought it would be fun to do a two-week baseball and poker road trip, visiting several stadiums and casinos I had never been to before. After graduating from college, I went on a four-city baseball road trip with my friends Kevin and Chad, but I had mono the whole time which was pretty miserable and forced us to cancel a fifth city and come home a bit early.
Kevin and Chad are living in different states now, but I had hoped that the three of us could do the trip together. Kevin was finishing up his PhD in South Carolina and moving to a new job in Florida (way to go Kev!) so he couldn't go, but Chad was able to make it work.
It was a really fun trip, and I'll take you through every stop we made. Wrigley Field is the only stadium on this trip that I had been to before, and I had never played poker at any of these casinos. This is the link to the blog we flooded with pictures throughout our trip.

July 30, Clinton, MO -- I started by driving 5.5 hours to Chad and Aften's home. They have a really nice house in a laid-back, peaceful town. I was quite impressed. We played some basketball, ate some good Mexican food and met some cool people at the Elks Lodge. Aften made us a really nice basket of snacks and gifts to open as we reached each new city.

July 31, St. Louis -- Chad and I embark on our journey. St. Louis has a really cool ballpark village right outside the stadium with huge TVs, bars and restaurants. It was modeled after Kansas City's Power and Lights district and we hung out there before the game. The game itself was kind of a snoozer (the Cardinals beat the Rockies 7-0), but Chad and I invented a game within the game, where we each picked 3 players beforehand and those players earned points based on their performance. We did this for every game on the trip but this was only one which ended with Chad and I tied. After the game, we found a cool old-school diner which featured six White Castle-style hamburgers for $6.60.
Getting out of town was a funny experience, though it wasn't funny at the time. The area around the park (not the best part of town) had streets and intersections all over the place, and we weren't sure where we needed to go so we had our GPS on. The thing had us turning every 5 seconds, but because the streets were so close together, every time we'd make a turn it would take a second to calculate that turn and then reroute us down a different street nearby. This process kept repeating itself so that twice in a 5 minute span we did a full circle and wound up at a stop light across the street from the very diner we had just eaten at. The second time we pulled up next to the diner we just burst out laughing before finally figuring out where we needed to go.

Aug. 1, Louisville -- We stopped in Louisville on the way to Cincinnati and it turned out to be a great afternoon. We had lunch at a place right next to the Triple-A baseball stadium. We sampled a couple local craft beers and took a peek inside the stadium, which was really nice. We then went to the Louisville Slugger museum and factory. We got to see how the bats get made and hold a game-used Mickey Mantle Slugger.

Aug. 2-3, Cincinnati -- We went to the Sunday matinee game vs the Pirates, the only day game on our trip. It was fairly warm outside, which amazingly was the last time on this trip that the temperature was anything but perfect. We got incredibly lucky in that regard. Before the game, we checked out the Reds Hall of Fame. It was really well put-together with a bunch of cool memorabilia featuring the Big Red Machine, the Nasty Boys, and the "Wall of Balls," a three-story-tall wall of baseballs representing every one of Pete Rose's record 4,256 hits.
The stadium was probably my favorite of the whole trip (not counting Wrigley), although I really enjoyed every place we visited. It would be splitting hairs to even try to rank the stadiums. The Great American Ballpark was built around the same time as the parks in St. Louis and Pittsburgh, and all three do a great job of showing off their city's downtown skyline. The only things that would give Cincy the nod over St, Louis and Pittsburgh is that Busch Stadium was a little tricky to navigate and the concourse in Pittsburgh was way too narrow, leading to massive congestion. (In fairness to Pittsburgh, the games we went to were sold out which is pretty rare occurrence there.) The highlight of the game in Cincy was the beanball war that resulted in a couple of bench clearings and five ejections. The Pirates won 3-0.
We played our first poker of the trip at the Horseshoe in Cincinnati. The casino was beautiful and had great food, the nicest one we went to. Chad and I both walked away with a little profit.

Aug. 4-5, Pittsburgh -- The weather was amazing and the view of the city from the river was breathtaking. The Cubs were in town and we went to two games here, the only stadium we visited more than once. We had good seats both nights, once on the first base side and the next night on the third base side. I much preferred the third base side because we had a constant view of the gorgeous skyline. My Cubbies won the first game 5-0 but the Pirates won the second contest. We witnessed long home runs from a couple of my favorite Cubs, Kyle Schwarber and Anthony Rizzo, as well as a dominating pitching performance from my favorite Cub pitcher, Jake Arrieta.
On Aug. 5, we went downtown early and parked at Rivers Casino, which was almost as nice as Cincy's Horseshoe. After playing poker for a few hours, we walked about a mile from the casino to the stadium. It was so nice outside we didn't even break a sweat. After the game we walked back to the casino and I picked up a little more loose change before we hit the road for Cleveland.

Aug. 6-7, Cleveland -- Cleveland was a bit of a paradox for me. As a city, it was my least favorite by far. But while I expected to be unimpressed by the stadium, I really enjoyed it and this was the most fun I had at a game the entire trip. I would say that in our experience the fans here were more personable and friendly than anywhere else.
We arrived on Aug. 6, which was a day off for the Indians so we played poker at the Horseshoe Cleveland. The casino was just OK and the poker room was really loud. At least Chad made some money there.
I thought the whole town was kinda dumpy, and it didn't help that we saw prostitutes on the street less than two blocks from the airbnb where we were staying. We got this airbnb largely because it had a washer/dryer and we needed to do laundry since this was the midpoint of our trip, however the washer was 30 years old and located in a basement filled with dirt and junk. The dryer didn't work, so we had to air dry our clothes.
On Aug. 7 I dropped Chad off at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I wasn't too interested in it myself because I have a different definition of Rock and Roll than they do, and also I wanted to get in a few more hours of poker. Because the casino is located in the heart of downtown (and right next to the baseball stadium), you have to pay to park there unless you play a certain amount of poker (or other forms of gambling), so I figured I'd get us some free parking and hopefully make some money as well. Unfortunately, I would have been better off financially paying for parking every day for a couple years.
The loss didn't sour my mood for baseball, however, and like I said it was the best game of the trip. Progressive Field didn't show off the skyline like the previous stadiums, but it was built more vertically than horizontally, meaning the park was more intimate and the fans closer to the action. We were in the outfield bleachers and had a great time interacting with the fans by us. Behind us was a group of four Twins fans who had had a few to drink and were quite boisterous. Next to us was three Indians fans who were quite knowledgeable about the home team. Those groups interacted peacefully despite their allegiances. We made it known that we were neutral and thus celebrated every big play with the fans of each team. The game was a see-saw affair that the Twins wound up winning 10-9.

Aug, 8, Detroit -- Detroit was a quick stop for us, just the one day with no attempt to play poker there. We arrived several hours before the game and decided to drive across the bridge to Canada, mainly just to say we were there. We had no problem getting into Canada, and we drove around for about 20 minutes before deciding that Windsor wasn't much different from America and now we could say we've been there, so we might as well head back to Detroit. At the U.S. border, however, we were asked to pull off for a search and some questioning. We ended up being there for an hour and a half, which was a little nerve-racking and not exactly how I envisioned spending our lone day in Detroit. They let us go without incident, but for those scoring at home, we spent 20 minutes in Canada and 90 minutes at border security, which I guess beats getting mugged in Detroit.
Comerica Park was pretty cool, although the kids' area with the carousel made me wish I had my kids with me. The game against the Red Sox was packed, and we had some of the worst seats available in all of Major League Baseball. Still, I enjoyed the brisket nachos and frozen custard at the game. We walked around the stadium and took in most of the game from the concourse at various points of the stadium, carrying on a nice conversation with a lifelong Detroit native and Tigers fan. David Ortiz hit a long home run but the Tigers held on in a great game, 7-6.

Aug, 9-12, Chicago -- We spent Aug. 9 and Aug. 12 at the Horseshoe Casino in Hammond, Indiana, just outside of Chicago, with the baseball games in between. The casino was kind of dumpy but it was the biggest poker room we played in, and I wound up doing pretty well there and turning a decent profit for the trip. Aug. 12 was my 9-year anniversary with Missy, which I celebrated by eating a lot at the buffet 800 miles away from my wife.
Aug. 10 was Angels vs White Sox at US Cellular Field. We had dinner at a bar across the street from the stadium, but I wish we had eaten the park food, because it smelled amazing and they had a ton of different options. The next day, before the Cubs game, we met a well-traveled Cubs fan who said the food at US Cellular is the best in the major leagues, and I can believe it despite only getting a churro there.
The atmosphere at the stadium was far and away the most relaxed of any place we went. For starters, the stadium was less than half full. But even so, the crowd was passe despite both teams being in the playoff hunt and the White Sox throwing their best pitcher, Chris Sale. After walking around the stadium prior to the first pitch, we noticed there were virtually no ushers patrolling the seats. So instead of heading to the upper deck seats we paid for, we took some unoccupied seats right behind home plate and never had to move. It was pretty cool to see the best player in baseball (Angels outfielder Mike Trout) go against one of the game's top pitchers from such a great vantage point. Sale and the Sox routed L.A. 8-2. If I had to rank the stadiums on our trip, this might be last on the list just because it's the oldest (besides Wrigley) and kinda boring, but I still really enjoyed it and would definitely go to another game there in the future. I really liked the laxxed environment and would love to sample more of the food.
Before the Aug. 11 Cubs game, I had some shopping to do so we headed to Wrigleyville several hours ahead of time. I got shirts for Missy, my mom, and all of the kids. I also splurged for a vintage-looking Andre Dawson jersey since we are naming our next baby Hawk after him.
I've been to Wrigley several times but not since Missy and I came while she was pregnant with Addison 7 years ago. They just put up huge new scoreboards in left and right field, and I was a little concerned that they would take away from the quaintness and old-time feel that makes Wrigley so special and unique. Instead, I was surprised by how much better the scoreboards make the experience. Because they are behind the field of play and the bleachers, you can watch the game without them getting in the way at all. But then after the play, you can watch a HD replay or see stats just like any other stadium. The old hand-operated scoreboard is still up in centerfield with all the out-of-town scores, and you can still see Lake Michigan in the distance. It's the best place in the world to watch a baseball game and the Cubs beat Milwaukee 6-3 on a 75-degree night in Chicago. It was a perfect way to end the trip.

Aug. 13, on the road -- We considered going to a game in Kansas City on our way back, and that would have been a good one as the Angels beat the Royals 7-6 with a ninth-inning rally. But we've both been to that stadium several times (it's behind only Wrigley and Fenway on my favorites list) and we met Aften in Overland Park, Kansas to help load up a couch she bought for them on Craigslist. I was missing my family anyway so I dropped Chad off with his wife and took I-35 all the way home. Woke up in Illinois and went to bed in Oklahoma City, with lunch at Mark Twain's hometown of Hannibal, MO. It was a long day and a long two weeks but it was worth it. Made a lifetime of memories and even a little money. I'm super grateful to Chad for putting up with me and to Skype for letting me see my family often enough to keep me sane.

P.S. I'll be sure to refer back to this blog in two years when Missy leaves me here with four kids to go to Paris without me.

Monday, July 13, 2015

I got the Russell Westbrook stink face and lived to tell about it

Is this thing on? Seems like every time I get an inspiration for a blog my wife gets pregnant so I've been exercising a blogless form of birth control these last several months.
Speaking of which, our fourth (final?) child is coming in September and we've decided to name him Hawk Harvey Franklin, in honor of a bunch of people. Hawk was the nickname of one of my favorite childhood baseball players, Andre Dawson. It's also short for Missy's maiden name, Hockett. And Harvey was Missy's grandpa's name, and Missy's grandpa was one of our favorite people in the world. He even lived with us during his last few months of life. We gave Maddux his middle name after my grandpa who was also pretty awesome.
So with another child on the way and doctor visits and such to pay for, it's the perfect time for everything to break. The TV, the computer and the garbage disposal all hit the DL recently, and the windshield on my car got cracked.
To fix that problem, I called Safelite, which has a catchy commercial jingle that is obviously way more important than actual competence. They were nice on the phone and I scheduled the windshield replacement for last Thursday, July 9, at 1 p.m.
However, on July 3 Missy's sister Terri went into labor a tish early, and Missy already had planned to fly up to New Jersey to spend some time with her (another unexpected but pleasant expense for us). So Missy moved her flight up to spend last week with Terri, leaving me home alone with the kids for a week and needing to reschedule the windshield appointment. No problem, I call Safelite and they give me several other times, including 1 p.m. on July 16, exactly a week after the original appointment. That seemed pretty convenient so I booked it.
Everything went great with Missy gone. The kids had McDonald's and Mountain Dew every day and went to bed at midnight. On Wednesday I'm waking up to get the kids around when my phone rings. It's Safelite calling to confirm my appointment for the next day, July 9. I tell the guy that I have already rescheduled that appointment for July 16. He doesn't say a word, just lets out the most exasperated deep and audible sigh that I have ever heard in my life. I hear some computer keys clicking and another one of these sighs, which are similar to the ones I have when I look across the room and see Maddux dumping a cup of milk all over the couch but know it's too late to do anything to stop it.
I'm just sitting there listening to these click-sighs for about 30 seconds before he says, "We don't have an opening on July 16." I tell him I already talked to someone several days ago and it should be booked. He starts in on another round of clicking and sighing, sounding just like I sound when I look across the room and see Myra coloring directly on the kitchen table but know it's too late to do anything about it. Finally he says, "Nope, we're all booked up on the 16th, and your name's not on here."
Then he mumbles something about, "Let me check here..." and starts the clicking and typing. After about a minute of that I finally say, "It's fine, we can do it another day. It doesn't have to be the 16th. But I can't do it tomorrow so just tell me what you do have open and we will reschedule this."
Now he takes it up a notch, with the loudest sigh in the history of the universe, even louder than the time I walked into Addie's play room and saw that she had taken the real maple syrup from our pantry and dumped the whole thing all over her play kitchen. He keeps clicking and sighing and doesn't say anything at all, so finally I say, "Look dude I'm sorry but I have to get my kids up and around. Just call me back later and we can reschedule the thing, I'm pretty flexible."
After a few more clicks and sighs, he says, "We can do July 20 at 4 p.m." I have no idea what day of the week July 20 is or what we might have going on but I say, "That's perfect," and get off the phone.
The next day I wake up to see I have a missed call from Safelite. (Who calls people at 7 a.m.?) and a voicemail that says they have a question for me. So I call back and talk to a young lady who says, "We were just calling to let you know we have an opening next week if you want to bring you car in." I ask when it is and she says...(drumroll please)....July 16th, at 1 p.m. I inform her that I briefly held that exact appointment time but was booted out of it by a guy who was sighing like I do every time my kids fight over a free Happy Meal toy when they have hundreds of dollars worth of better toys in their rooms. She didn't seem too interested in my story and got off the phone with me as fast as I did with the Sigh Guy. Now we'll just have to see if I actually get my windshield replaced on Thursday, July 16 at 1 p.m.

-------------------

What does that story have to do with Oklahoma City Thunder All-Star point guard Russell Westbrook? Well. the reason I need a new windshield is because I was texting and driving in a parking lot and ran right over him. Smacked his head right on my windshield and broke it. He'll probably never play basketball again.
Gotcha! That didn't really happen. But I really did get the Russell Westbrook stink face and live to tell about it.
While Missy was gone, my mom agreed to come watch the kids one day so I could play poker. It just so happened that Russell Westbrook was in the mood to play poker that day and it just so happened that I ended up playing at his table.
I've gotten to play with RWB maybe 10 or 12 times over the years, and he's a cool enough guy to be around. He'll answer questions about where his favorite places to travel are or what his opinion is of infamous referee Joey Crawford. About the only thing he won't do is take a picture with you, and I can respect that. He makes it pretty clear that he doesn't want his picture taken in the casino.
Westbrook is my mom's favorite player, so since she was watching my kids I texted her and told her that I was playing poker with her favorite basketball player. The first thing she says is, "take a picture and send it to me." I said no, he doesn't like his picture taken. She says, "Just tell him it's for your dear old mother and he is her favorite player in the world." I didn't want to get into a back-and-forth with her about it so I figured I'd just sneak a quick picture when he wasn't looking and send it to her. He was only two seats away from me so I had to be in stealth mode but at the same time it wouldn't look totally awkward like it would if I was on the other end of the table and trying to lean around to point my phone at him.
I made sure my phone was on silent so it wouldn't make a loud clicking sound and then I snapped the thing. What I didn't realize was that for the first time in 5 years of owning this phone I somehow had the flash on and it was pretty daggone bright and directly in his eyes. As soon as I saw the flash I jerked the phone down and pretended to type on the phone as if I was texting someone and the flash just accidentally went off and/or had nothing to do with me taking a picture of Russell Westbrook. I saw his head snap over in my direction and he was giving me pretty much the exact same look he is giving at the top of this page (assuming you're not in text-only mobile phone mode, in which case you can just Google "Westbrook mean face" and see about 75 examples). I felt like the biggest idiot in the world and just kept my head down pretending to type. I may have soiled myself. 
Luckily, I've played with RWB enough that he knows me and likes me (or at least he did before this), Regardless, he didn't say anything (and I've heard him call out other people for picture snapping at the table) and we interacted normally the rest of the night. I never mentioned my mom or admitted to anything. I just wanted it to go away.
I went ahead and sent the picture to my mom. Ironically, the picture is quite blurry because I jerked the phone down as soon as the flash started going off. She texted back and said the pic was too blurry and I needed to take another one. I said there's no way I'm pointing my phone in his direction the rest of the night. And I didn't.

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I'm pretty excited about a road trip I'm getting ready to embark on with my bestie Chad. We are going on a six-city Midwest baseball and poker trip featuring eight Major League Baseball games and hopefully boatloads of cash won at poker tables in these cities. 
He started up a Tumblr blog just for the trip, where we will post pics and stories. I'm not sure it's operational right now but we'll be posting stuff on Facebook/Twitter about it as well so if you care, keep an eye out for it. Our trip is basically the first two weeks of August and our wives are the most awesome people ever for letting us do this.

Monday, February 2, 2015

Impractical Pokers and Extraordinary Extras

In between poker hands the other night at the Firelake Grand Casino in Shawnee, America, my buddy Brant leaned over to the food tray right next to him, grabbed the steak knife, cut a piece of sirloin, dipped it in A-1 sauce, took the bite, grabbed the napkin and wiped his face.
For doing this, I promised him a small amount of money and a blog, which I am now writing.

One of my favorite TV shows is Impractical Jokers, where four buddies make each other perform embarrassing tasks in public. Whoever does the poorest job of completing these tasks is further humiliated in the form of a punishment conceived of by the other three. It's like National Geographic for immature people.
Brant also likes the show, and we were talking about it when a complete stranger at the table right behind us received his steak dinner. I challenged Brant to take a bite of the guy's steak, and he had to complete all of the tasks listed above. For starters, I thought there was no way he would actually do this, but even if he did I tried to put enough contingencies in there so that he would surely get busted, which is what I really wanted to see happen.
The food tray with the steak was placed right in between he and Brant as they sat back to back at the adjacent poker tables. The steak orderer was around 30 years old and wasn't making too much noise at his table. He seemed pretty focused on his card game. But he was also pretty hungry, because for the first 10 minutes the steak was there he was going at it pretty consistently. He'd turn back to the card game just long enough to fold his hand, then get back to eating. Brant would lean his chair back as if to stretch his arms but would never have enough time to go for it.
Because Brant was turning around and staring at this complete stranger's food tray every 15 seconds for half an hour, other people at the steak eater's table started to notice that something strange was going on. Three players in that game were giving Brant consistent suspicious looks every time he turned around, although the actual steak eater seemed oblivious and I don't think anyone ever alerted him to the danger his dinner was in.
Because he wasn't man enough to complete the task in time, I cancelled the bet when it appeared the dinner was finished and made several comments about how Brant wasn't man enough to complete the task in time.
Then the unthinkable happened. Actually two unthinkables. First, the dude went back and took another bite of steak. This proved that he might not be quite finished and opened the door for Brant to win the bet if he hurried. But there was only one or two bites left on the steak.
I still didn't think he could do it since he attracted quite a bit of attention during his first 49 sissified attempts at it. But somehow the eyes of God looked down on Brant and immediately provided a poker hand in which the whole table was involved. Brant leaned over and completed the entire task without ever being noticed, and the guy never turned back around to eat his last bite. It was really boring and annoying and I'm writing this blog under protest. It would have been much more awesome had he gotten busted; I might have felt like I got my money's worth that way. We thought about leaving the guy a $5 poker chip and a thank-you note which probably would have been appropriate.

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I also want to take this opportunity to tell you about a brand new nonprofit organization which I'm excited to be a small part of.
When I was in college I went with a group to the Philippines, where we worked with a Bible college on an education project and also did a little disaster relief in Manila. It was an awesome trip that I'll never forget and definitely gave me a lifelong love for the people there.
Missy took a humanitarian aid trip to Tanzania when she was in college, so she also has a heart to help those around the world who haven't been blessed with all the things we have in America.
Our friend Katie went to the Philippines on a disaster relief trip and while there she discovered the huge need for education among the poorest in that country. Education is the best way to solve the worldwide poverty problem, and Katie immediately went to work on the issue, coming up with creative ways to provide fun, supplemental educational tools as well as part-time jobs.
Now back in the U.S., Katie launched Extraordinary Extras, with the goal of returning to the Philippines to continue her work there while also starting after-school programs here in Oklahoma. Eventually we'd like to be worldwide force for fighting poverty through education with programs around the globe.
Of course, this requires money, and our first fundraising effort is a T-shirt campaign. We have a few cool colors to choose from and the shirts do a great job of stating our mission. The link to the T-shirts is here. (Note: Don't use autofill when filling out the address or billing information; for some reason it won't allow the order to be put through that way). 
We'd love you to visit extraordinaryextras.org to learn more about the organization or perhaps make a tax-deductible donation. We also have a Facebook page. Let's work together to help fight poverty through fun eductaion!

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

I Still Love You, Dad

One of my earliest strong memories of my dad involves a game of catch in the backyard. I had just started playing baseball and was only beginning to be proficient at catching a ball from more than a few feet away.
Dad was rolling me some ground balls, lobbing a few fly balls, and tossing a few soft liners, one of which hit me smack in the nose. I started crying, but the main thing that has remained in my memory was dad's reaction. His eyes got huge and it was obvious that this event affected him way more than it did me. Of course he had no reason to feel guilty; he hadn't thrown the ball hard at all and it was a sheer accident. I don't even remember if I got a bloody nose. But he was shaken up for the rest of the day. Causing the slightest bit of hurt to anyone -- especially his children -- was something dad could never abide.
Delbert Kenneth (Ken) Franklin was the antithesis of the overbearing parent. He never pushed us to do anything we didn't want to do, and he provided 100% support and 0% criticism in everything we did. I'm not saying that's the best formula for perfect parenting, but that was the only way he knew how to be a father.
My siblings and I had varied talents and interests. I was pretty much all about sports and writing. My brother was an incredibly talented musician/dancer/singer. My sister was something of a hybrid, an All-State athlete with artistic and journalistic skills to boot. Dad, a former athlete with a Master's degree in music from Oklahoma City University, had the ability to give each of us 100% of himself in all of those areas. He was the loudest cheerer at Allison's cross country races, the first one to give a standing ovation at Andrew's musicals and the first one to want to read my newspaper stories and tell me how good they were.
He never got onto a ref for a bad call or onto a coach for more playing time. Part of that was being the most non-confrontational person I've ever known. Part of it was having more unconditional love than anyone I've ever known.
I can only remember him raising his voice a handful of times and never saw him even close to raising his hand in anger, despite his three kids giving him ample reasons to do so.
In my mind, there was never a question of which one of us or our hobbies dad loved more. They, and we, were 100% equal, and this is something that I once took for granted; now I recognize how special it was.
The same can be said for dad's work ethic. Five days a week for 25 years, he came home drenched in sweat after walking several miles in the Oklahoma sun with a heavy mail bag on his back. I can still instantly conjure an accurate nasal memory of the smell of that sweaty postal uniform. The job was taking a toll on him physically and he hated the politicking that kept forcing him to change routes, change start times, or do more work in less time than he felt was physically possible. But he clocked in every day, and when I would meet him for lunch at a fast food place that was on his route, the other mailmen eating with us inevitably told me that they envied dad's always-sunny personality. Some of them made fun of him for it.
That always-sunny personality could sometimes be pretty annoying. When we went golfing, he would be optimistic that the balls I shanked all over the course would turn out to be good shots. He'd yell "Bite!," "Get legs!" or "Turn over a little now" as soon as it was obvious to everyone else that I'd be nowhere near the green. He always thought we'd be able to find the ball that I'd hit into the middle of a dense forest, long after I was ready to give up and move on with the round. Still, those once-a-week golf outings were special times for me, and I've hardly played in the ten years since then because golf just isn't the same without dad.
Now that I'm a father of three with a wife and a mortgage, I recognize the sacrifices that my parents made to give us the best upbringing they could. Mom and dad could have driven nicer cars, gone on more dates or put more money toward their retirement, but instead they spent that time and money on their kids.
For dad and I, that meant playing golf when the weather was nice and going to baseball, football and basketball games together. Dad was a huge St. Louis Cardinals fan and I rebelled by cheering for the Chicago Cubs, a decision that has so far cost me a couple of World Series celebrations. But in the middle of the steroid era, we drove to St. Louis for a three-game series between the two rivals. In the car, dad said he hoped to see Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa hit three home runs each and the Cardinals win two out of three. I told him he was delusional, then watched Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa hit three home runs each and the Cardinals win two out of three. I saw it as a crazy coincidence, but dad didn't act surprised at all. He always expected the miraculous. He always had faith.
Although that series certainly ranks near the top of all of my "dad memories", for me nothing will beat the games.
My family always playing games; that's what we did. Board games, card games, dice games, you name it, we played it. I couldn't even begin to guess how many different games we played over the years. Dad and I liked playing games more than the rest of the family, and often it would be just the two of us.
After I moved out, I loved to come home, get a free meal, and spend the evening playing cards with mom and dad. For mom, one or two games was enough. But dad and I would play until he had to go bed. It wouldn't even be a discussion. One of us would pick up the deck, shuffle and deal. I usually didn't know which game we were playing until dad quit dealing. Four cards was a quirky but fun game called casino, six cards was pitch, eleven cards was gin rummy, etc. We'd talk about sports, school or work until the game neared its end, then all our attention was on the finish. Dad loved dramatic finishes, which was annoying when he won but he would show the same enthusiasm for the game if he lost on the final play. I can still picture our post-it notes filled to the max with scores from various card games. Dad always wrote and circled the letter W under the name of whoever won, although we never made any effort to keep track of who was winning the games long-term.
Then there was the laughing. Always the laughing. Slapstick was by far his favorite, although he could laugh at just about anything, especially himself. There was no mistaking or hiding that laugh. No restaurant big enough to keep everyone in the place from hearing it, no one else's laughter over the same topic loud enough to not be drowned out. If a moment was bereft of laughter, he'd pick up some random goofy object, put it on his head, cross his eyes and make a Three Stooges face until you laughed. And if you didn't laugh, he'd laugh so loud that you couldn't help but laugh at the fact that he cracked himself up so easily.
                                             
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When I was 16, I bumped into a car in a parking lot. I was a straight A student who had good influences for friends and never got into trouble. I didn't want to get in trouble for this either. So I panicked and drove off. Luckily, someone spotted me. I fessed up and got a good lecture (and probably a grounding of some sort) from my parents, and then I had to call the person whose car I hit and apologize. That lady was understandably upset and gave me another good lecture which included calling me a few not-nice names. After all of that, I felt like a loser. I'll never forget hanging up the phone and walking over to my dad, who was standing in the middle of the living room, about to go upstairs to bed. I wrapped my arms around him and just started sobbing. Dad wasn't real good at giving life lessons or expressing his emotions, but he let me hold on to him as long as I wanted, then he told me that I was a good kid and he loved me.
That was quintessential dad. In that moment, I didn't need advice or a scolding. I needed a dad that would hug me and tell me he loved me. Luckily, I had that dad.

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I was already moved out and in college when I got a call from mom that dad was in the hospital. He was dealing with depression and anxiety. That didn't make any sense at all. Dad was never anything but happy, relaxed, carefree. He pretty much let mom make all the day-to-day planning decisions and just went with the flow without complaining. I remember seeing him cry when his mom died -- and that was about the only time I saw him cry.
I dismissed the whole thing out of hand, but I did go to the hospital to visit him. He was acting weird, and showed me a drawing he had made of an apple being eaten by worms. He told me that it represented his heart, which was corrupted and bad just like the worm-riddled apple. 
I looked at him and the drawing in disbelief, told him he was the most loving person I knew and that his drawing was in no way reflective of his heart. Then I got out of there as fast as I could.
I refused to believe that this person was my father. I assumed that in a short amount of time, he'd snap out of whatever this was and go back to being normal. Then I could forget I had ever even visited him at the hospital or that he had made this weird drawing. Let's just get back to normal. Give me my dad back.
That's basically what happened. He wasn't in the hospital very long, and when he got out he was back to being my same old dad. Happy, laughing, talking sports. At least 95 percent of the time. When I was around, anyway.
I wanted to get as far away from that other dude as I could. I didn't want to lend any credibility to this poisoned apple business, didn't want to talk about it. Occasionally I'd ask him or mom how he was doing. I knew on some level he was still struggling, but it didn't make any sense to me and I just kept thinking (hoping, really) that it would go away. It was awkward. 
I told him I was interested in learning how to play guitar, and he bought me a really nice Taylor acoustic for my birthday. (More than 10 years later, I still get compliments on the guitar). Dad was a good guitar player who, prior to meeting mom, had made a living playing and singing in various bars and clubs around town. He taught me the basics, then wrote down the chords and lyrics to his most popular song, one for which he was offered a decent sum of money (1970s money anyway). On the top it said, "By Ken Franklin."
I said with a laugh, "Dad, why did you write your name on the top here? Are you afraid I'm going to take this song and claim it as my own and become famous without ever giving you credit?" He just smiled and shrugged his shoulders. I thought it was weird. Makes more sense now.
Also weird was how dad started bowing out of our card games half the time. I was driving more than an hour to have dinner and hang out with my parents. Mom always went to bed at 8 p.m., but I expected to get a couple more good hours of card playing out of dad. Sometimes that would happen like normal, but sometimes he'd play one or two or zero games instead of 20 and go to bed at 8:30. Said he was more tired than usual lately. Makes more sense now.
What does depression really mean, anyway? Aren't we all sad sometimes? I never thought there was any chance dad would hurt himself. In my 25 years I'd never seen dad hurt a fly, never do anything but walk away at the first sign of conflict.
  
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Our family got together a couple of days after my birthday to celebrate with a dinner at Red Rock on Lake Hefner. I brought my girlfriend Missy, who dad always loved. She enjoyed a good laugh almost as much as he did.
After the dinner, we all went back to mom and dad's house. I said good night to mom and she went to bed. It was just dad and I in the living room. I asked him if he wanted to play cards. He said no, he was heading to bed also. He told me he needed me to pray for him, that he was having some bad thoughts. 
For someone who never shared his personal feelings and emotions at all, who in fairness didn't even know how to share his personal feelings and emotions, this was a massive statement. But I refused to carry its full weight. I didn't want to talk to the guy with the weird drawing. Let's just get back to normal. Give me my dad back.
I assumed that his (and all) depression was a temporary feeling that would eventually subside. Suicide is for people who don't have moms, dads, kids, friends or co-workers who love them. I refused to even consider the possibility that this was a serious medical issue that was relentlessly attacking my father.
On top of all of that, I was the son of a man who never shared his personal feelings and emotions. I'm not good at it either, and I didn't know what to say. 
I know I told him I would pray for him, and I know I did pray for him. But I had no clue what was really going on and I have no idea what I said or prayed in that moment.
I decided to go ahead and drive back to Lawton that night. It was a Sunday, and I had to work Monday afternoon anyway. In the doorway, after my little chat/prayer with dad, he gave me a huge hug. It was just like the one he had given me nine years before, when I hit-and-ran in the parking lot. We were standing in almost the exact same place in the house. Again, he squeezed me tight and told me he was proud of me and he loved me. I told him I loved him too. It was the last thing I ever said to him.
Mom called me early Wednesday morning -- November 17, 2004. Told me dad had abruptly left the house before dawn, still wearing his pajamas. She didn't know where he was, maybe I should come home if I could.
I left my apartment without changing out of my pajamas. I didn't pack anything, just hit the highway. My brain was going a thousand miles an hour, but within minutes all the clues started coming together and I knew I'd never see him again. I didn't know how he'd done it, but I knew he did it. What was an impossibility days earlier was now a certainty. While driving 90 mph up I-44, I slammed my fist against the steering wheel. Again. Again. Again. My hand hurt. I yelled at the top of my lungs. I was pissed at him. At myself. At him. My throat hurt. My heart broke.
By the time I got to the house, my siblings were already there. They held out hope of finding him. My mind wanted to believe that was a possibility, but my heart knew the truth. A friend of the family called to say they saw a car that looked like his parked next to a pond close to our house. I drove over there with my brother-in-law, saw that it was indeed his car parked askew near the pond.
"He's in there," I said, never more certain of anything in my life. I didn't want to be there one more Godforsaken second. I got back in the car and drove home. My brother-in-law talked to someone, and soon enough a firefighter dive squad went in and got him. 
They fixed him all up at the funeral home. The rest of the family went to see him. I refused. A family friend told me to reconsider, that this would be my last chance, that it might help bring some closure, start the healing process. I still said no. I wanted that bear hug and those I Love Yous to be my final memories of him. I still don't regret it.
I couldn't handle the funeral. Every single seat in the church we grew up in was full. The choir loft was full. It was so humbling, an awesome tribute, to know how many people my dad had touched. It was also maddening, knowing he wasn't supposed to go this early. What if he knew he had impacted all these people? What if he knew all these people loved him?...
Every emotion imaginable flooded me the moment I walked in and saw the crowd. I was supposed to be strong for my mom, who was clutching my elbow as we walked down the aisle. I wanted to be strong, but I cried uncontrollably the entire time.
Later, our family drove to Sulpher, Oklahoma, a beautiful place with a bed and breakfast mom and dad would often go to. I took out the Taylor and played this song as we scattered his ashes.

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Ten years. Can it have really been that long? A lot has changed in that time. Dad got to walk Allison down the aisle, but he didn't get to meet her three awesome kids. He didn't get to see the miracle God worked in Andrew's life, meet his wife Jordyn or their newborn son William. Didn't know I married Missy or get to meet our three kiddos, all of which are displaying the same zeal for laughter and life that he had.
He didn't know that I now play card games for a job, that all of those hours we spent with post-it notes at the kitchen table were in fact crucial training sessions for a future career. Who'd have thunk it? I think about it now, at least once a week while sitting at the poker table, and I can't help but smile.
I'm not going to lie, I still get mad at dad sometimes. For missing out on all the things I just mentioned. For not being there for mom. For ruining golf and slapstick comedy for me. For not playing guitar with me. For not playing Chutes and Ladders with my kids. For making me feel guilty for being so incredibly ignorant and not doing more. Ultimately, however, I know that I'm just a kid in the backyard who took a baseball to the face. He never meant to hurt me.
I understand now better than ever how lucky I was to have such a loving and committed father, who was there for every milestone in my life while he was alive. Who busted his tail to put food on the table and allow us to have the experiences in life that we'll never forget. Other kids had nicer cars, nicer clothes. I shared a clunker with my sister but got to watch Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa hit three home runs each in one weekend.

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I still cringe when I see or hear people make jokes about suicide. You know, the whole finger gun to the head and pull the trigger thing. It's ignorant, just like I was until it hit me real close to home. This is a serious thing, yet it seems like the public and even the medical community is centuries behind in dealing with it.
Just like cancer can make a strong person weak, depression and other mental health issues can slowly or quickly damage an otherwise healthy person. I hate telling people that didn't know dad that he committed suicide, because I think it gives the impression that he was moping around the house all the time, when nothing could be further from the truth. He loved and appreciated the small details of life as much as anyone I've known. 
He was healthy, he got sick, it kept getting worse, and eventually the disease won. I'm not going assign a certain percentage of blame to him. I know who he really was.

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My deepest fear is turning into my father. The first time I experienced depression was two years after he died, on my honeymoon. I had no idea what hit me. I couldn't stop crying, wasn't eating and didn't want to leave the hotel room despite being in Arenal Volcano Mountains of Costa Rica, one of the most gorgeous places on the earth.
This was obviously a sucky situation for Missy, who didn't know what to do. She'd been married for 24 hours and her husband was already losing his mind. All I could tell her was that I loved her and had no regrets about marrying her. Those things I knew deep down in my heart. But that was all. I had no idea why I was so sad. Maybe it was because I never really dealt with dad's death head-on, never got counseling. Maybe it was because all the people at our wedding reminded me of all the people at dad's funeral, such an unexpected outpouring of love that I wasn't equipped to handle.
Whatever it was, it went away after about three days and the rest of our honeymoon was awesome. In the eight years since then, I've had a few other, less severe episodes. Not many.
I don't like talking about it, not even with Missy. I'm not good at it. I don't feel like I need medicine all the time for something that pops up less than once a year (so far), and I don't trust the medicine out there anyway. I personally know a lot of people who have been tremendously helped by the medicine, but I also know at least one person who got significantly worse. So I do nothing. This is probably exactly the same thing most people do, up until it's too late. Or almost too late.
In some ways, I already am turning into my father. I'm pretty easy going, I'll usually go along with whatever my wife wants without complaining. I got begged into getting a dog about whom I am at best ambivalent, yet I'm the only one who feeds him and takes him to get his shots and haircuts. I spend my free time reading nonfiction and watching sports. I'd rather eat at home than go out, and I'll eat just about anything. I sweat like a faucet when I work out. I laugh a lot, don't cry much. Still not one to talk about feelings and emotions.
Does that mean I'll be fine for another 20 years and then it will hit me like it did dad? Was he struggling with it hardcore the whole time and just hiding it up until the end? Will I learn from what happened to him and do something different? Has the world around us changed, making it easier to deal with these issues and get help? Or is it harder now? These are things I think about.

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On Monday, November 17, 2014, Addison bounced up to me and asked if we could play a game. Please? Please? 
We played Memory, letting Myra play too although she didn't know what was going on and kept trying to turn all the cards up even when it wasn't her turn. Maddux tried to eat a card.
Addison loves playing games with me as much as anything. Hide and Go Seek is her favorite, but she'll play anything I want for as long as I want to play it. I've even taught her a card game or two.
We always play by the rules and I never let her win. I help her make the best strategic decisions, but what's really important to me is her attitude. When she played T-ball and soccer this year, I didn't care how good she was or what the refs did. I wanted her to give 100% and then I told her how proud I was when the game was over.
This is the only way I know how to be a father to my kids, because it's exactly the way my father taught me. And if I can show my kids half the unconditional love and grace that he showed me, then maybe turning into my father isn't such a bad thing after all.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

The $8.80 mirage

My last two trips to the WinStar World Casino in Thackerville, Oklahoma have not been fun.
On the first trip, I got food poisoning and was throwing up for about 24 hours. The illness also caused me to miss half of my fantasy football draft, and when I finally felt better and got around to checking my team, I was delighted to see that the computer had drafted me two kickers, two third-string running backs, a backup running back and an extra tight end.
I then proceeded to lose at the poker also.
After a couple weeks away from that dust toilet, I returned to the WinStar World Casino in Thackerville, Oklahoma this weekend. The short version of my poker experience there is that I was winning for the first 32 hours (over 3 days) I was playing there and managed to lose all of that profit and a little more in the final 20 minutes of my stay.
The big, final pot involved a James Bond-esque four-way all in. Except my opponents weren't international villains dressed in tuxedos. I was up against a drunk guy who announced he was going all in without looking and then did exactly that, a guy who looked at his hand extensively and still didn't know what he had when the hand was over, and a guy who announced, "F*** it, let's gamble" before moving his chips in.
So we get all in for a lot of money and the dealer is not really sure what is going on. Because we each had different amounts of chips when the hand started, there are three separate pots, and the poor girl is a bit flummoxed. She's not being helped by the players, one of which keeps insisting that he has three of a kind when in fact he has a stronger hand than that (a straight), and the other two of which think they have lost but have actually won at least one of the pots in question.
The only real loser is me, who went from first place to last place in the hand in about 5 seconds and is for some reason trying to help the dealer sort out who wins which pots and how big those pots are.  Finally I snap to it and say, "What am I doing? I'm the only one who lost this stupid hand. I'm out of chips, I'm not buying any more and I'm going home. Good luck figuring this out, I'll see you guys later."
Not wanting to leave empty-handed, I walk over to the poker kitchen to redeem my $8.80 comp before I go. I'm not really hungry, but they have snacks like trail mix and peanut butter crackers that I could buy and put in my cute Thunder purse for next time.
So I go to the counter and there is one gentleman ahead of me. He is briefly arguing with the cashier about something but after 30 seconds he is gone and I step up. Except the cashier lady is now gone. I wait for a minute and nobody comes up. The lady looks right at me, doesn't say a word, walks out of the door right next to me and leaves without acknowledging me. There are a couple cooks in the back but that's it. Finally, after a couple of minutes my blood is boiling a little and I decide I'm not waiting any longer. But after walking away I decide I'm going to spend that $8.80 even if I just throw the food in the trash for spite.
So I walk out of the poker room to the nearest restaurant -- which just happens to be the hot dog and hamburger place I got food poisoning from. They also have shakes so I decide I'll just get a shake for the road. Until I get over there and see that there are about 50 people in line for this joint. I'm definitely not standing in line for an hour for a shake that may or may not give me food poisoning, so I walk to the next-nearest restaurant, Dairy Queen.
There's a much shorter line there, and after waiting for 5 minutes I'm up. I order the Oreo Cheesecake Blizzard, which sounds like it might have just enough calories in it to make me temporarily forget my economic troubles. I give the lady my WinStar Rewards card, which she can't seem to get to work. After consulting with her manager, I am informed that although I do in fact have an $8.80 comp on my card, they can't get it to work. They know the comp is on there, but they can't redeem it so I'll just have to pay. Will that be cash or credit? I asked if they are accepting middle fingers as payment. (Of course I didn't actually do that. But I was only interested in 1100 empty calories if they were free, as my desire to give away money had abruptly come to a halt minutes earlier. So I left Dairy Queen Blizzard-less.)
Depressed by my ability to give away a lot of money and not redeem $8.80, I left WinStar World Casino. The ole Honda made record time coming home, where my awesome wife had homemade cookies waiting for me and I got to see my three precious children.
I just spent 30 seconds trying to come up with a corny tie-in ending but you get the picture. God is good and "My Lucky Life" doesn't even begin to describe it. We'll get em next time, at least for $8.80.


Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Aunt Sally

Earlier this year, I wrote about losing my poker mentor, Buddy Williams. Now I've also lost the person most responsible for my other career, journalism.
I worked on the newspaper at Westmoore High School for three years, becoming the editor my senior year. During that time, I wasn't really interested in going to college for journalism or ever working in that field, but journalism teacher Sally Burr, better known as "Aunt Sally," pushed me to apply for the scholarship that eventually led to a degree and a career.
Not to go all "circle of life" on y'all, but it is kind of crazy how these cycles overlap like this. I kept in touch with Buddy and Aunt Sally enough over the years to know how proud they were of me for succeeding in poker and journalism, respectively, but what they enjoyed hearing about more than that was my kids.
Buddy passed away just after our first son Maddux was born. Now Maddux is eating cereal, fruits and veggies for the first time and I've never seen a baby gobble up food more ravenously than this boy. He doesn't let a bite dribble down his chin, he sucks it all down immediately and demands more! I know this is corny (pardon the veggie pun), but it reminds me of how I ate up all the poker advice Buddy gave me and how eager I was to sit by him and discuss strategies or just hear old poker stories.
Our oldest daughter, Addison, started kindergarten this week. Obviously the school thing jives with Aunt Sally's passing, but I think Myra might be the future journalist among our kids. She doesn't know very many words, but a couple of times a day she charges right up to you and starts on a rambling story which includes facial contortions and pointing gestures. She knows how to tell a story, she just needs a small grasp on the language.  
This blog was originally going to be about my recent trip to Kansas City for my friend Chad's bachelor party. When we heard that Aunt Sally had passed, Chad (a fellow Aunt Sally pupil) reminded me of one of our not-so-finer moments as members of the JagWire, a story that took place just down the road from Kansas City. Like me, Chad started in that lonely journalism room about half a mile from every other classroom at WHS and ended up spending about half of his adult life in a journalism career as a copy editor for The Daily Oklahoman. Since he doesn't have three kids to deal with yet, I decided to turn the rest of this blog over to him.
(Above is a picture of part of the newspaper staff in 1997, although I can think of several fellow JagWire members who aren't in the picture. The top row is Aunt Sally, me, Chad and my sister.)

By Chad Anderson
WHS Class of 1997

I can say I never had another teacher quite like Aunt Sally. Tough but fair, with a great sense of humor, she put in longer hours than any teacher known to man. I can trace the path of my career to two high school courses: "Intro to Law" with Richard Bruce and newspaper class with Aunt Sally. The latter was definitely more fun.
I joined the JagWire newspaper staff halfway through my junior year. At first, Aunt Sally was ultra skeptical of me and thought I just joined the staff to hang out with my buddy Matt (aka your usual blog author). My first few drafts were bleeding red after she took her pen to them. But after we put out a few issues and I showed my stuff, she saw me in a different light. By year-end, she named me sports editor for my senior year. By the time I graduated, she was helping me win a coveted OU journalism scholarship. Matt got the same scholarship a year later. 
There are plenty of great stories that arose from our high school journalism days, like when Matt and Lisa pulled the wool over Aunt Sally's eyes at a state competition. But I have a different favorite story.
Let me preface by saying sometime before the events of this story, Matt and I had seen a SportsCenter story involving NBA player Rik Smits, in which the anchor uttered the line "Smits hitting the fan." I don't know the original context but it became an inside joke catchphrase (among many) for the two of us, used anytime something wasn't going so great.

Sometime later, we went on a journalism trip to Topeka, Kansas (don't be jealous!). The main purpose of the trip was for the yearbook staff to visit their publisher. The newspaper staff was invited along. Topeka has to be better than going to class, right? Matt and I hopped on board. 

There were probably at least three dozen kids on the trip. In addition to touring a yearbook publishing plant, we also visited the Kansas State Capitol. For an evening meal, the bus pulled up to a cafeteria that was attached to a mall. Grumbling in line, I figured there were better options than a cafeteria. So Matt and I ducked out of the line and into the mall, searching for a food court. We found one, tried our luck with Chinese food, and sat down to dine in style. We figured we had plenty of time to finish eating and slip back into the cafeteria. We might even stop by Foot Locker on our way back!

Unbeknowst to us, back at the cafeteria, the group was rejected because of problems with Aunt Sally's method of payment, which was probably some archaic school purchase order. So our classmates reboarded the bus, tired and hungry. Aunt Sally counted us off before the bus departed, but ... uh oh ... two students missing!

The first sign that we might be in trouble came when our names were called over the PA system at the mall, as if we were 5-year-old kids who ran away from their mom. (Actually, I guess that's almost exactly what happened.) But before we could say, "Oh, Smits!" we saw Aunt Sally charging toward us. It was the maddest we ever saw her, and we had seen her temper flare a time or two. She snatched us up, made us toss our noodles, and led us back to the bus. The group found another place to eat (I think it was Chili's). But Aunt Sally made us stay on the bus without dinner. 

Of course, we thought the entire thing was absolutely hilarious, so instead of dwelling on our misdeeds, we spent the time on the bus laughing and cutting up. I had my back to the restaurant and was laughing it up, when Matt said, "Smits hitting the fan." I laughed at the inside joke, which somehow made sense with whatever we were talking about.
But then Matt said it again, with more intensity.

"SMITS HITTING THE FAN, RIGHT NOW!"

It was Aunt Sally, boarding the bus, joined by a dude from the publishing company. She delivered a lengthy lecture about how she expected more from us and she loved us. The guy with her, whom we didn't even know, was repeating everything she said, which was quite awkward since he told us he loved us several times and we didn't know his full name. Between that goofball, and the 'Smits' comment, I don't know how I held it together for the duration of her talk. 

My sister took a photography class years later, and had a much different experience than I did. But for members of the publication staffs, Aunt Sally really was like a loving family member. When I heard we lost her this week, my first thought was, "Smits hitting the fan now."




Tuesday, July 29, 2014

You Need to Watch Your Speed

My philosophy in life is to have 99 good days out of 100, then blog about the bad one.
So here goes.
The first couple hours went pretty well. I got up early, went to the gym, played basketball for the first time in ages and totally dominated (there are no living witnesses to disprove this statement). I then showered, picked up a shake and a few protein bars, and headed to the world-class Lucky Star Casino in Concho, Oklahoma to play some poker.
I was feeling good, re-living in my head all the amazing basketball shots I made, when about a mile from the casino I saw the cop lights.
Eighteen years ago this would have been a source of panic, but by now I've been pulled over a couple dozen times and gotten maybe half that many tickets so it's really no biggie. The only thing that sucked is that, unlike all but about two of my pull-overs, I wasn't attempting to speed and didn't know I was speeding.
The following is the actual, unedited conversation I had with both the voice in my head and the Canadian County officer who pulled me over. I assume his primary job is as a secret service FBI Gestapo agent and he just works for Canadian County on the side.

Officer: You in a hurry, buddy?
Voice in my head: Good one, Barney Fife.
Me: No, I'm sure I was speeding but I really wasn't trying to. Just wasn't paying attention.
Officer: Where we are now is a 65 mph zone, but back by that bridge it's 45 and I clocked you at 63.
(I had forgotten about the classic speed trap back by the bridge, where it goes from 65 to 55 to 45 in a half-mile span for absolutely no reason on a four-lane highway in the middle of nowhere).
Me: Okay.
Officer: That's just too fast. You need to watch your speed.
Voice in my head: Sure thing, skippy.
Me: Okay.
Officer: Where you headed?
Voice in my head: None of your business.
Me: The casino
Voice in my head: Your mom's.
Officer: Do you always take a gym bag with you?
Voice in my head: No, only when I go to the gym.
Me: No, only when I go to the gym.
Voice in my head: Oops.
Officer: What's in that paper bag right there in the center console? Anything I need to know about?
Me: Just some protein bars. (I dumped them out.) Want one?
Officer: No, just making sure it wasn't liquor or drugs. Looked like it could have been. OK, well 63 is just too fast so I'm going to have to write you a ticket. You need to watch your speed. Just hang tight, I'll be right back.
Me: Okay.
(While he wrote my ticket, I never took my eyes off the speedometer, which was at zero. Already getting the hang of this Watch Your Speed thing!)
Officer: Like I said, 63 is just too fast, but I wrote the ticket for doing 55 in a 45. That'll save you a little money and won't go on your driving record. Just sign here.
Voice in my head: It's super generous for you to set up a blatant speed trap and only charge me $188.50 for driving 2 mph under what the speed limit should be.
Me (signing): Okay, thanks.
Officer: Just watch your speed for me, OK?
Me: Okay.

So I got to the casino down $188.50 and left eight hours later down a bunch more speeding tickets. Good times. Today I pleaded no contest (does anyone plead guilty on those things, and why do they even have two options where the result is exactly the same?) and mailed a check for $188.50 to the Canadian County Court Clerk.

Just to be clear, while I did find this particular Canadian County officer to be a tad hyper-vigilant, I do have a great deal of respect for all police officers. They're putting their lives on the line every day to make us safer while I'm playing a card game and occasionally spewing off blogs and sports stories for very little money.

P.S. Answer the poll question on the left!

Friday, June 13, 2014

Joseph Lee Core, Jr. and Maddux Musser Franklin

Father's Day Weekend would seem like the perfect time to write about Maddux, our firstborn son who came into the world on Jan. 9.
But it's not the perfect time. It's the time I'm forcing myself to write something, because it's been five months and this is the hardest story I've ever written.

How do you write a story that mixes the greatest joy known to man with the strongest sorrow in the whole wide world? How do you write a story that in fact is two of the greatest joys and two of the strongest sorrows? And the hardest part -- Our greatest joy is a constant reminder of another family member's strongest sorrow. In fact, our greatest joy wouldn't be here without their strongest sorrow.

Back it up four years. We rented a condo in Vegas for the month of June 2010. It was an exciting adventure. Addie was 18 months old, she loved the pool and she loved life in general. Missy and I were excited at the news that she was pregnant. But two days before Father's Day, we found out that Missy had miscarried.
Over the next couple of years we tried and failed to get pregnant again, and Missy was convinced that she wouldn't be able to have any more children. So we got into foster care, and that's how we ended up with Myra.
That part was simple enough. Strongest Sorrow #1 followed by Greatest Joy #1.

The rest of the story just isn't fair.
Missy's sister Terri and her husband Joe were also having trouble getting pregnant. They had already adopted an awesome girl, Grace, but they wanted to expand their family with children of their own. Some tests revealed that the problem was with Terri's eggs.
Terri and Joe decided to ask Missy if she would be willing to donate her eggs to help them get pregnant. This wasn't a simple request -- it meant Missy would have to fly to Baltimore (where they lived) several times and then undergo a procedure to donate them, not to mention doing hormone treatments here in Oklahoma.
But it was obvious why they asked Missy. Despite not being blood relatives, Missy and Terri look a lot alike and have very similar personalities. I can say without hesitation that Terri is the most similar to Missy of anyone we know or are related to. And if you know Missy, you know she didn't hesitate to say yes.
We actually went through the whole process twice. The first time, when Missy flew out to Baltimore to undergo the procedure, a test the day before revealed that the timing had been just a little off, so they had to cancel the whole thing and start over.
It was a crushing blow to both Missy and Terri. Emotionally and financially, this couldn't happen over and over again. After a couple of months, they decided to give it one final shot.
The second time, everything came together wonderfully. The procedure resulted in Missy donating an unusually high number of good eggs, and a subsequent procedure resulted in Terri carrying a healthy baby boy.
Because of all the hormones Missy had taken, the chances of her getting pregnant went up drastically, and the day after we agreed to begin the adoption process with Myra, we found out Missy was pregnant too. Terri was about two months along, and the two were on the phone non-stop sharing their pregnancies with each other.
First, Terri found out they were having a boy. Then we found Missy was also having a boy. For a little while it looked like the cousins would get to live very close to each other. Terri and Joe visited and considered moving to the Dallas area before settling in Delaware instead. Regardless, the boys were going to be a part of each other's lives forever.
As the 2013 holiday season began, the sisters were on the phone even more as Terri's due date drew near and the doctors appointments became more frequent. Both babies and mommas looked perfectly healthy.
The day after Christmas is Addie's birthday. We always try to make that a special day for her and so we were having a small party with all of our family who was in Oklahoma City for Christmas. Missy and I were cleaning up the kitchen after the party when her phone rang. Terri had gone to the doctor in the morning and the baby's heart rate was fine. For some reason -- nobody knows why -- as the day progressed he wasn't fine. Terri had to go through labor knowing that her son was already gone.
Losing a child is the hardest thing in the world, and that pain was only intensified by the lengths and bounds Terri and Joe had gone to get this boy in the first place. It was also incredibly hard on Missy, who struggled with the sorrow but also with how to handle her relationship with Terri. Did she need to back off, knowing that she couldn't share her pregnancy news without reminding Terri of her tragedy? Or did Terri need her now more than ever?
Missy got permission from her doctor to fly to the east coast for the funeral services despite being almost eight months pregnant, and the services for Joseph Lee Core, Jr. were beautiful and heart-wrenching.
Barely 24 hours after she returned, her water broke. Maddux was a month early and between the holidays and this tragic event, we were totally unprepared. Missy's labor was long and hard, but after almost 24 hours he came out just fine at 8 lbs, 1 oz., 21 inches long. He had a few minor issues that resulted in us being in the hospital for five days, and that was a really hard time for us, especially Missy. Having just returned from grieving with her sister, she was emotionally and physically exhausted and experiencing the entire range of emotions. It was the best and purest joy to hold our first son, but it was worst kind of sorrow to think about the fact that Terri had been deprived of this very joy for no reason at all.
You question everything. You question God. You cry. You get mad.
We certainly haven't come up with any good answers, any sense of closure. Missy and Terri have done a great job of working through their individual emotional issues and maintaining a great relationship with each other, but that doesn't mean the road will ever end.
For Terri and Joe, one of the most important things is not letting Joseph be forgotten. I can say unequivocally that he will never be forgotten in the Franklin household. We thought the cousins would be two months apart, but it turns out that Maddux showed up less than two weeks after Joseph. We will never look at Maddux without seeing a small reflection of Joseph.

I don't have a pretty bow to put on the end of this thing. I'm not going to put one of those generic "cherish your kids" speeches in here and wrap it up.
Sometimes life sucks.
All I know is that I'm looking at Maddux at this very second, and I couldn't love him any more. So far, he has a pretty serious personality. Unlike Myra, who smiled every second of the day at his age, he likes to furrow his brows and give a menacing look. But he loves being held and being talked to, and he will crack a smile and a laugh when he gets in the mood.
Nothing is greater than the love of a parent for his or her child. That's how God looks at each and every one of us, and that's how the Core family looks at Joseph Lee Core, Jr.

We love you Joe, Terri, Grace and Joseph,

The Franklins

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Land of the Cow

According to a recent informal survey, 90% of Americans we know say my wife and I are brave. The same percentage acknowledge that when they say "brave" to our faces, they are really thinking "stupid" in their heads.
"Brave" was by far the #1 answer/reaction when we told anyone we were taking our three kids and going to India for a couple of weeks to visit my sister and her family.
It ended up being a great trip, and I wanted to share a few of the more entertaining moments.

You know how it's funny to watch pharmaceutical commercials where the list of potential side effects is far longer and more terrifying than the symptoms the drug is intended to treat? It's not quite as funny when it happens to you.
I've always had a problem with motion sickness, particularly on long flights. I've never thrown up on a plane but I've been close a couple of times, so before this trip Missy wanted me to see a doctor about getting a prescription for it.
The doc ended up giving me some patches called Scopolamine, and I put one on a few hours before our 16-hour flight from Dallas to Dubai. (From there we had a 3-hour flight to Delhi and a 2-hour flight to Northeast India).
A few hours into the flight I started feeling quite weird. It wasn't motion sickness, but just a general uneasiness in my head and stomach. I got up to stretch my legs and quickly felt very dizzy and lightheaded. I stumbled in the general direction of my seat, evidently knocking over a flight attendant before collapsing into my seat. I lost feeling in my hands and feet and wasn't breathing well.
For some reason, the flight attendants thought I was having blood sugar issues (which I have never had) so they made me drink some sugar milk and eat a candy bar. I went along with that because it meant I got to drink sugar milk and eat a candy bar. They also hooked me up to an oxygen tank.
After a few minutes on the oxygen, the woman sitting next to me said, "Excuse me, but I notice that you have a patch under your ear. Is that a motion sickness patch?"
I said yes and told her the name but explained that I wasn't having my usual motion sickness issues. Then she asked if I had ever used this patch before. I said no.
She said she was a doctor and that she tells her patients never to take the Scopolamine patch for the first time on an airplane. She said the side effects I was experiencing were common and strong, so I should have taken the patch at home to test it first. Plus, the side effects are often diminished after multiple uses. Slightly too late for that at this point. Then she told me to go to sleep.
Lesson learned. I went to sleep for awhile before another, far less serious but nonetheless quite irritating side effect kicked in -- dry mouth. I couldn't get enough water. This lasted for a couple days after I took the patch off. I probably drank two gallons during the rest of our travels and peed about 57 times, but 45 minutes after one drink I'd feel like my mouth was a desert.

We made it to Delhi, where we were staying the night and began to get the full India experience. We had booked a Western-style hotel that advertised itself as being 15 minutes from the airport. Then we found out it was really 50 minutes from the airport. Then we got into a cab and it took almost two hours to get there.
I use the term "cab" loosely. This thing was more like a go-kart. My mom, wife and three kids were crammed in the small back seat, while I rode shotgun, literally sitting on top of the engine.
It didn't take long to realize that the cab driver had no idea where he was going, and he didn't speak English. It was hard to blame him for being lost, since there's no real addresses and most streets have no names. The "address" of the hotel (which ended up being really nice) was just a general area, "Precinct 21" or something like that. Once you got to Precinct 21, you just drove around until you found it.
Also, I was pretty sure we were all going to die that night in one of two ways. Way #1 was that Indian drivers are crazy!!! Each road is roughly the size of one-and-a-half U.S. lanes, but they drive at least three-wide. You have pedestrians, bicycles, motorcycles, cars, vans, and semis going both ways in these tiny roads with no lane markings or procedure. People just honk all the time. That meant they are coming and you'd better get out of the way. There are a few traffic lights, which are entirely ignored by everyone.
After driving around for 15 minutes or so, our driver pulled over and asked me to get out. He then lifted up my seat and poured water on the engine, which my buns could have told him was running quite hot. Then he continued driving, seemingly in circles, until we were out of Delhi and into the countryside. This is Way #2 I figured we'd die. Since I knew the airport was in Delhi and our hotel was in Delhi and Delhi is one of the most populated cities in the world, it didn't make sense for us to be in the middle of nowhere at any point of this cab ride. Six Americans and all their luggage at 1 a.m. in Delhi seemed like a pretty easy target. I figured we'd pull off and get ambushed. Indeed, the cabbie pulled off again. This time, he walked around to my side but just stood there for a minute. Then he poured some water on his face. Then he poured a little on his index finger and brushed his teeth with it. Then he got back in and started driving.
Finally, after wandering around for another 30 or 45 minutes, he pulled over and asked someone for help. We were at the hotel in less than five minutes. (The drive back to the airport the next day took 50 minutes).

The Indian culture is fascinating. Everyone knows the cows are sacred, but there are all kinds of animals all over the place over there, just wandering around amid millions of people. We saw goats, pigs, chickens and donkeys just roaming around. They belong to nobody.
India is largely Hindu, so there are thousands of gods everywhere that people worship. The crazy thing is that in a third-world country with extreme poverty, the gods live in luxury. Near my sister's house there's a massive marble temple with two gods inside. It was probably three stories tall. Outside the door was a big bell you were supposed to ring to wake the gods up before you went in to worship them. Within yards of this idol mansion, hundreds of migrant workers lived in small huts with dirt floors and no electricity or air conditioning, eating almost nothing besides rice and vegetables.
Aside from spending great quality time with my sister and her husband and watching her three kids play with our three kids, this was the best part of the trip, just being immersed in the culture and getting an appreciation for their daily lives.

There is a fairly new Western-style shopping mall close to their house, and that provided quite a bit of entertainment.
The people there haven't quite gotten the hang of elevators and escalators yet. When we walked to the escalators for the first time, my brother-in-law Matt said "Watch, I guarantee we'll see some people who have never seen an escalator before."
Sure enough, we didn't even have to wait. The people right in front of us stood, staring at the escalator and then back at each other, trying to figure it out. Finally, one of them took the leap of faith and screamed in excitement when they started moving down.
A different time, we were going down in the elevator, and it stopped one floor above where we were headed. When it stopped, there was a man on the other side whose nose was basically pressed against the door. He couldn't have been any closer to the elevator without being in it. The doors opened, and he just kept standing there. We motioned for him to come on, but he just stared at us. Finally, the doors closed, almost trapping his nose in them, before it continued downward. I almost died laughing.
We went to the Subway at the mall, which was slightly different than an American Subway. Of course, there were no beef products (the meatball marinara is my favorite), so we had to try something different. I ordered a pepperoni melt, then was told it would cost extra to toast it, which would seem to be the only way to put the "melt" in pepperoni melt. Then when I asked for lettuce, tomatoes and veggies, I was told no. All I got was pepperoni and cheese. I asked if I could pay extra for veggies. The answer was no.

The first full day we were in India, I went to play basketball with Matt and some of his friends. I was extremely jet-lagged but figured it would help get me over that. So we start playing, and as usual I'm jacking up 3-pointers without really warming up at all.
My first three shots were airballs. Like, not even close. I know I'm no Ray Allen, but I usually don't embarrass myself on the basketball court. It's the only sport I consider myself halfway good at.
The next couple shots barely grazed the front of the rim. I was a little surprised but figured it was just the exhaustion. My head was still a little dizzy from the Scopolamine and jetlag. One of my teammates said, "You're going to have to shoot it harder." I said thank you, I realize that.
After the first game, which we lost thanks to my horrible shooting, the same guy says to me, "You know this is an NBA 3-point line right?" I did not know that, nor did it ever cross my mind while I continued bombing treys. I think I was able to get my overall 3-point percentage into double digits before the end of the day.

 There were a lot more great memories, but I've written enough for now. If Allison or Missy remember something else that should be added I can just tack it onto the end. Like I said, we had a really great time and it was an experience to remember. I'm glad we were "brave"!