I was subjected to cruel and unusual punishment Sunday night.
I went to the casino to play some poker, and they sat me directly across from the 90-inch big screen TV projector.
The Pro Bowl was on, and I was forced against my will to watch it for three hours.
I've always thought the Pro Bowl was a joke, but I hadn't watched any of it in at least five years. After watching it, my opinion has gone from it being a joke to being an outrage.
It's a ridiculous waste of everyone's time. To even call it "football" or "a sport" is an insult to everyone from Vince Lombardi to John Daly. Yes, I'm saying that fat golfers display more athleticism than what is seen in the Pro Bowl. The WNBA would be a close call.
I was just casually watching the game between hands of poker, with no sound. Early on, there was a handoff to LeSean McCoy. Right after he got it, the offensive and defensive linemen kind of slowed up, and McCoy made a half-hearted jog right into them and flipped the ball to the ref.
I just assumed there was a false start or something, but then it said "2nd and 8" on the screen and I realized there was no penalty. That's a football play??? Not only was he never tackled, he was never even close to being "in the grasp."
Between the hideous uniforms, the lack of athleticism displayed and all the hugging, I felt like I was watching "The Biggest Loser."
Look, I get it. These guys don't want to get hurt, and the game is simply a symbolic reward for a good season.
That's fine, but putting it on national television and expecting people to watch it is an insult. The NFL probably figures, "Hey, these idiots will watch the 6th round of our boring draft and they'll watch Tulane play Western Michigan in the Kill Yourself Bowl, so we'll just tell them to watch this."
We've got to take a stand.
The other sports at least have something to offer. The NBA All-Star game is a farce, but they do some cool dunks and try for the final two minutes if the game is close. Baseball's ASG is the best, because the players try just as hard as they would in a real game. You don't see CC Sabathia lobbing balls underhanded to Ryan Howard and then hugging after Howard smashes one into the upper deck.
A couple of my Facebook friends had good suggestions to improve the Pro Bowl. One said to turn it into a skills competition and another said to have a flag football game where the winning team wins a bunch of money so they try harder. Both are good ideas.
There's absolutely no reason to continue to play an actual football game under the current setup. It's even worse now that they moved the Pro Bowl in front of the Super Bowl. Players from the best team in each conference don't even show up. If I'm gonna watch a quarterback shred fake defenses, I'd much rather it be Tom Brady than Ben Roethlisberger.
Just announce who made the team and save us from the embarrassment of actually playing it. Do the skills thing, the flag football thing, or nothing. Whatever. Give us something worth putting on TV, or don't put anything on at all.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Growing Up in the Dark Ages
Allow me to apologize for the long delay between blogs. During football season, I was doing a bunch of freelance newspaper writing, and I decided that getting paid to write about football games was slightly more important than doing a blog for my own kicks and giggles.
Then we went to Thailand for two weeks for Christmas, which was AWESOME. It was me, Missy and Addison, my brother, my mom, my sister, her husband and three kids. Her kids are ages four, two-and-a-half, and nine months. Addie turned three while we were over there. They loved playing together and of course it was a great and rare opportunity for the Franklins to all be together in a beautiful country. I posted some pics on Facebook.
Anyway, what I was going to write about was the fact that for two weeks, we had virtually no access to those staples of American culture, phones and internet. Our phones didn't work at all, and we didn't bring our laptop. There was a community computer at the resort we stayed at, but I only got on it twice in two weeks.
It was really nice to be free from those things, they can definitely bind you and take over your life if you let them. I know I spend way too much time on them.
While we were in Thailand, I got to thinking about how much different our lives were before those things. Many of you may not be old enough to have experienced this, but when I was in high school (graduated in 1998) I didn't have a cell phone and our computer was so slow that all I'd ever do on it was check my e-mail.
Growing up, if I wanted to call a friend I had to pick up the house phone and call their house. Usually a mom or dad would answer and then I had to ask for my friend. If they were there and available, we could talk.
Many times, just picking up the phone in our house was a chore. Between my parents and little brother and sister, it was in use quite a bit. And since our internet was dial-up, if anyone was on the computer it tied up the phone line as well. Picking up the phone when someone was on the computer was a big no-no, as it booted them off the internet and they had to start all over (not a swift process back then).
Texting would have really come in handy for me back then, since I was a typical teenage dude who didn't really want to chat up his friends but just wanted to see if I could get a game of basketball or Super Nintendo going.
Overall, I'd say the advances in technology are a very good thing. Many a fight in the Franklin household would have been avoided by all of us having our own phone line. Also, it seems odd now that when I was in high school, I could go out with my friends and my parents would have basically no way to get ahold of me. I ran with some really good guys so we were never drinking or doing anything too stupid, but not everyone is that lucky.
Of course, everything must be done in moderation, and there's definitely an epidemic in society now with kids who can't carry on a real conversation and spend all their time on their phones and laptops. It's something we'll be handling with Addison not too long from now. (I know I sound like an old man).
It's really funny to think back to the days of having to wait for my sister to get off the phone so I could call someone. Or when I was convinced my girlfriend was calling but my brother probably wouldn't even switch over on the call waiting. Or of waiting literally several minutes for a web page to load, and this was before the days of Google, YouTube, Facebook and Twitter. I don't even remember what web pages I ever went to, other than AOL to check my e-mail and ESPN to get sports scores.
I'd be ripping my hair out if I had to do those things now. If a web page takes 10 seconds to load, I'm muttering under my breath.
Anyway, I found a hilarious video on YouTube that sums it up pretty good.
Then we went to Thailand for two weeks for Christmas, which was AWESOME. It was me, Missy and Addison, my brother, my mom, my sister, her husband and three kids. Her kids are ages four, two-and-a-half, and nine months. Addie turned three while we were over there. They loved playing together and of course it was a great and rare opportunity for the Franklins to all be together in a beautiful country. I posted some pics on Facebook.
Anyway, what I was going to write about was the fact that for two weeks, we had virtually no access to those staples of American culture, phones and internet. Our phones didn't work at all, and we didn't bring our laptop. There was a community computer at the resort we stayed at, but I only got on it twice in two weeks.
It was really nice to be free from those things, they can definitely bind you and take over your life if you let them. I know I spend way too much time on them.
While we were in Thailand, I got to thinking about how much different our lives were before those things. Many of you may not be old enough to have experienced this, but when I was in high school (graduated in 1998) I didn't have a cell phone and our computer was so slow that all I'd ever do on it was check my e-mail.
Growing up, if I wanted to call a friend I had to pick up the house phone and call their house. Usually a mom or dad would answer and then I had to ask for my friend. If they were there and available, we could talk.
Many times, just picking up the phone in our house was a chore. Between my parents and little brother and sister, it was in use quite a bit. And since our internet was dial-up, if anyone was on the computer it tied up the phone line as well. Picking up the phone when someone was on the computer was a big no-no, as it booted them off the internet and they had to start all over (not a swift process back then).
Texting would have really come in handy for me back then, since I was a typical teenage dude who didn't really want to chat up his friends but just wanted to see if I could get a game of basketball or Super Nintendo going.
Overall, I'd say the advances in technology are a very good thing. Many a fight in the Franklin household would have been avoided by all of us having our own phone line. Also, it seems odd now that when I was in high school, I could go out with my friends and my parents would have basically no way to get ahold of me. I ran with some really good guys so we were never drinking or doing anything too stupid, but not everyone is that lucky.
Of course, everything must be done in moderation, and there's definitely an epidemic in society now with kids who can't carry on a real conversation and spend all their time on their phones and laptops. It's something we'll be handling with Addison not too long from now. (I know I sound like an old man).
It's really funny to think back to the days of having to wait for my sister to get off the phone so I could call someone. Or when I was convinced my girlfriend was calling but my brother probably wouldn't even switch over on the call waiting. Or of waiting literally several minutes for a web page to load, and this was before the days of Google, YouTube, Facebook and Twitter. I don't even remember what web pages I ever went to, other than AOL to check my e-mail and ESPN to get sports scores.
I'd be ripping my hair out if I had to do those things now. If a web page takes 10 seconds to load, I'm muttering under my breath.
Anyway, I found a hilarious video on YouTube that sums it up pretty good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
