A slippery slope greased by polynesian sauce

After years of getting away with an incredibly shady business practice, Chick-Fil-A is finally getting called out onto the carpet.
That's right, I'm talking about how those stupid cows still don't know how to spell. They've been writing for years, but their spelling and grammar is disgraceful. "Eat more chicken" is a simple phrase. Learn it properly or don't try to sell me chicken.

Seriously, this week's Chick-Fil-A fiasco has gotten me a bit riled up. It's 13 percent ridiculous that this is a news story in any way, shape or form, and 113 percent scary that politicians are trying to take measures to shut Chick-Fil-A out of their cities.
It really shouldn't be a surprise that the CEO of a company known to be Christian would be against gay marriage. This is a restaurant that forgoes millions of dollars of profit to be closed on Sundays. That's extreme even by hard-core Christian standards.
I'm sure there are lots of different polls one could point to on the subject of gay marriage, but the ones that I looked at (by NBC, ABC, The Wall Street Journal and The Washington Post) showed that between 53 and 54 percent of Americans support gay marriage. Well, I can guarantee that the percentage of Christians who like to make a profit 7 days a week instead of 6 is higher than that, so the gay marriage thing should have been a forgone conclusion.
I could see a controversy brewing if the dude said he didn't want to serve gays, or that there would henceforth be a separate line for them, or that they would not be hired by the restaurant. (I have heard a lot of Chick-fil-haters push that last point as if it were a fact, but they've been unable to provide one shred of evidence to support it).
All he did is express his personal belief on an issue that about half the country agrees with him on anyway. But that doesn't even matter. He could say that he firmly believes the earth is flat and get less backlash than this.
OK, so half the country lives under a rock and thought Chick-fil-A was closed on Sundays because all the employees go three sheets to the wind every Saturday night and need Sunday to sleep it off. Now you're outraged to find out they're Christians who believe in something. I get it. Fine.
Solution: Don't eat at Chick-Fil-A. Tell your friends not to eat at Chick-Fil-A. Organize a national boycott of Chick-Fil-A. This is how America is supposed to work. Their bottom line will take a hit, and if enough people don't eat there, it will go out of business. That'll show 'em.
That should be the end of the story, but it isn't. Politicians are actually trying to shut down Chick-Fil-A restaurants, and if they succeed, I shudder to think about what the future holds for our fine country. It's like going down the cookie aisle and seeing the Double-Stuf Oreos. You know you don't need them, but you think you've earned it and you'll only have a couple. Two hours after checking out at the grocery store, the whole pack is in your stomach. And you're out of milk.
I heard the dude from Chicago who is trying to lock Chick-Fil-A out say he felt he needed to take a stand because in his heart, he knew Chick-Fil-A was bigoted. That's a direct quote, not a paraphrase. He also said the people of Chicago don't agree with his views, so that's another reason to shut them down.
Since when is a politician's gut feeling enough "evidence" to shut down a restaurant? (Even if it was "from the heart," which is far more conclusive than just a random gut feeling...) The dude in Massachusetts shutting Chick-Fil-A out of Boston had the same rock-solid evidence of discrimination, by which he meant absolutely no evidence whatsoever.
Although nothing should surprise me when it comes to my uber-liberal friends, I have to admit to being a little taken aback by their desire to see Chick-Fil-A shut down. I thought that was the kind of thing they accuse the conservatives of doing to people that disagree with them. In one thrilling Facebook debate (in which he was utterly destroyed), one buddy said that despite any actual evidence of discrimination, the fact that the company and its CEO give money to Christian organizations supporting traditional marriage justifies any and all legal measures to shut them down. He also equated Chick-Fil-A to the KKK trying to open up shop in Oklahoma City. (Who wants some Ku Klux Khicken? Just like the customers, the meat's all white!!!)
It takes zero creativity whatsoever to come up with a scenario in which all of the people who want to shut down Chick-Fil-A would be proven to be absolute hypocrites. You don't even have to change the subject, you just have to change the location.
I'm confident in saying that the majority of the people in the state of Mississippi are against gay marriage, and gay marriage is not legal there. Using the exact same logic, anyone that supported gay marriage and/or donated any money to that cause could have their private, for-profit business that is absolutely unrelated to gay or straight marriage shut down. You think these Birkenstock-wearers would like that? It appears the sandal is on the other foot now...

Can we please just go back to being Americans and let capitalism and freedom of speech work like they are supposed to? Let the CEO of Chick-Fil-A have an opinion, and if that opinion offends you, then don't eat his chicken sandwiches. He will make less money. Because this is America and we are a free country, you can even express your displeasure over his opinion and try to get other people to not eat his chicken sandwiches. But you don't get to stop the production of chicken sandwiches over a difference of opinion.
(Steps off soapbox).
I'd really prefer to go back to not caring about politics, and to go back to writing blogs about poker, sports and bad restaurant experiences now.
I'll close with a unifying statement that all sides can agree on. That polynesian sauce is freaking amazing. And those cows need to learn some gramer. I mean grammar.